It’s A New… Bee-DAY… Upping Your Toilet Game With Bidets

Somewhat of a touchy subject for some, and yes there is going to be a sh&* load of double entendres here given we are talking about the very best of humours.. that of the toilet persuasion, we have recently gifted our upstairs bathroom with a washlet/bidet toilet seat, and could not be happier with the outcome. Complete with oscillating front and back spouts, heated water, deodorizer and adjustable temperature dryer, toilet paper use has decreased significantly, and the first visit of the day to the cold, cold bathroom is slightly less painful now as least our butts are warm. North America is actually pretty.. behind… when it comes to posterior cleanliness and washing properly when finished our number two’s — rather ironic given our reputation as germ-o-phobes. The first exposure to the bidet/toilet combo, as opposed to the stand alone bidet/looks like a short water fountain thingie, was at a friends who had the ultimate in toilets: a Toto. See below. (this is the creme de la creme, not exact representation of initial toilet experience)

Or for… the most of us who can’t so much afford the $3,500 option…

Toto Washlet C100 Toilet Seat Bidet $559.99 from Wayfair.ca

I must have spent 3x as long on the toilet, and I didn’t even need the targeted cleansing option to know I had found a gadget whose eco-friendly and mega-comfortable ethos I could totally buy into. Did you know that the way we currently use toilet is super wasteful, kind of bad for our tender parts and not particularly clean? Ya. And no, wet wipes, which are mostly not flushable even if they say flushable, do not count. There’s loads of research and articles online that discuss how wrong the toilet paper only approach is, and how much easier it could be if we just got over the disposability/flushing the dirt away point of view. We’ve chosen a few faves to highlight here, and the cost doesn’t usually reflect the $5,000 gold standard. You could actually have a system for less than $100.

Ours cost approx $500, so not something you could necessarily buy on a whim, BUTT a very worthy investment whose cost is easily offset by the sharp decrease in toilet paper usage and cost you will notice once you start using one of these bad boys. Now for some other options at a lower price point – Mind, the fewer bells and whistles, the lower the cost, so if you are good with cold water and some Scandinavian inspired functional minimalism…

Tushy Spa Warm Water Bidet in White and Gold $99 USD from HelloTushy.com (Tushy.com is a COMPLETELY different experience… So pay attention!)

Or a similar but less good looking option under $55…

Or feel free to stop by next time your in the hood to use ours… You can bet your behind you’ll never look… back? Make number two comfort your number one toilet criteria? I could go on…

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Christmas Lights 101: How Soon… Is Too Soon?

Although we hold ourselves to the highest of aesthetic standards and integrity for the majority of the year… when it comes to the holidays (and Christmas lights) we are unabashedly NOT tasteful or restrained. Not even a little bit. Although we don’t completely cover our own house with lights and inflatables (as we are also very stingy when it comes to electricity bills) we 100% support everyone around us going absolutely ape sh*t with the lights.

188 Brock Ave in West End Toronto (for more visit blogto.com)

As a wise man (Karl Pilkington to be exact) once said:

But how soon is TOO soon to get the lights out and put the tree up? We are already woefully late to the party in terms of lights as ours are up as of today, but the other side of the street has been aglow for almost a week already. Again, no skin off our nose really as that is what we are looking AT, and it’s still pretty dark on our side of the street, which we don’t have to look at, but STILL. Given the amount of deals available care of Black Friday/Cyber Monday sales, it’s safe to say that putting the exterior decor up on the house over American Thanksgiving weekend is a good place to start. Everyone has sales going on.

NOMA Outdoor Christmas Fairy Lights, 50-ft ON SALE $39.99 at CanadianTire.ca 

Loving these indoor looking, but outdoor acting, delicate, wire fairy lights. Excellent for wrapping around spires and railings on your front porch, or some artfully arranged birch limbs, perhaps?

Loving the nouveau vintage vibe of these indoor flickering lights. Great for intertwining in a garland on the mantle, or framing an apartment window, and accompanied by some mulled wine.

Being mindful of that whole warm white/cool white divide is also super important, as there’s nothing worse than just looking for ‘white’ outdoor lights and realizing too late that what you have already doesn’t match what you got because you didn’t realize you had to specify. Cause you do. We currently have cool white to go with the dripping icicles we have that hang from the ceiling of the porch, but are also major fans of the classic warm, which is what we have on the inside. These cool white lights would be great if you got 3 or 4 strands and jut went nuts on a front yard tree or some bushes for the full starry night effect.

Supertek Window Wonderland LED Projector with 12 Movies ON SALE $69.99 from BedBathAndBeyond.ca 

This rear projection display comes with 6 Christmas and 6 Halloween movies that you can project on a window in your house…. But the listing doesn’t show what the other ones are, just this one… If there’s a timer it would be pretty funny to have your 6 holiday scenes interrupted by a screaming ghost for 1 second.. To entertain the dog walkers and passers by. And then insist when people point out that you’ve got ghosts in your lights… that you have no idea what they are talking about. For some entertainment WITHIN your entertainment. 😉

This thing is not remotely on sale, but look at it. It’s ridiculous and awesome at the same time. Because only in Canada would you have a Buckingham Palace styled guard complete with moose face. In lights. That’s 6 feet tall. Maybe you can automate it to try to attack people when they walk up to your front door. For some holiday sh%ts and gigs.

And now, if you’ll excuse me… They only have 10 sets of these left at my local Canadian Tire, so yeah… Just need to nip out for a bit. As you were… Putting up your lights! DO IT.

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Stuff We Love: Marble Mania (for the masses)

There are few natural stone surfaces that have captured our heart more than marble over the past few years. Although definitely trendy, and we will include a few examples here on the more ‘hip’ side of the trend for sure, because why not, white marble has transcended many decorous centuries relatively intact (save for the odd missing male reproductive organ/strategically affixed fig leaf of bygone eras).

Neoclassical Marble Bath $45,011.89CAD from 1stDibs.com

The thing is though… Marble can also be a gigantic pain in the a%&. It’s still relatively expensive as a material for furniture, it’s heavy (duh), porous (no red wine/tomato sauce for YOU!) and un-fixable once cracked (let me tell you the one about when someone tried to clean the chandelier above my parents marble dining room table, and stood on the table, and then…They now have a stainless steel dining room table). So how to get the look of marble without the big bucks? Have we got some finds for you!!!

As much as we have our hearts set on that marble bath for our country estate, imagine the difference in shipping alone… Oven mitt vs giant, #$%& off sized 18th century bath thingie? Not even sure if that bath will fit into the back of the Canada Post van… With the mitt set, however, you can be classy while you burn things!

Now you can legit protect your table from red wine stains using the most not recommended for wine stains material in the world! But look how cool these are! Practical? Maybe 50% of the times. Affordable? 100% of the times.

WALL CLOCK WHITE (Marble & Copper) $30 USD by Will Wild from Society6.com

And speaking of time… #seewhatididthere This is a great little piece to add to a gallery wall, an office or even a Scandi-inspired kitchen.

You cant even GET a blanket made from real marble anymore (I think they stopped making them when people started getting crushed/throwing their backs out when trying to fold them), so this is the perfect ‘make your couch look like an Italian piece of art’ alternative. AND you can wash it.

Or you could go for the full 8 hour a day experience instead… A far lighter alternative to an entire bed made out of the stuff, that’s for sure. Also an inexpensive way to decide if that marble mausoleum you and your friends were looking at chipping in on is a good long term investment for post-life relaxation.

And just because you can… Why not add some gold into the mix? A great option for dressing up a grey couch with a little machine washable splendour. And there’s a rose gold version too. For rich people pillow fights.

In case you aren’t quite sure about changing up the hardware in your kitchen to brass but still want a little bit of that love by the back door… $100 will get you the fix you need. Can also be used in a fancy bathroom for jewelry and perfume storage…Yummy.

And for the slightly more practical tech head, a geometric bluetooth speaker that’s as stylish as it is portable. Would look very nice resting on that CB2 shelf come to think of it…

Marble Wallpaper by Ferm Living $124.00 CAD from TheModernShop.ca

Oh that old wall? Yes, entirely marble. They had to bring the pieces in with a crane they were so large! Yes I realize I have no balcony or windows large enough  in my apartment so that may technically be impossible. Stop harshing my mellow, dude.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I must retire to my newly installed steam room for a cleansing respite from all this opulence. All this fabulous can be exhausting… But with affordable shipping!

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